For those of you who do not know I suffer from major depressive disorder with frequent suicide ideation, hashimotos thyroiditis, polycystic ovarian syndrome, and pre-menstrual dysphoric disorder. Recently I was hospitalized for suicide ideation. I’m slowly making a recovery. However after leaving the hospital I wanted to have a fresh start. I decided that I was going to exercise seven days a week, go to therapy twice a week, eat super healthy, sing, write poetry everyday, paint, go to groups, volunteer, work extra shifts, and maintain relationships. I basically decided to do everything, and I wanted to do it perfectly. Maintaining a schedule like that would drain anyone. However I ended up draining myself physically in record time due to the fact that my thyroid issues were worse than I thought. Not realizing this my mood went back to it’s lowest low. So even though I’m in recovery, it’s not steady.